megay:

HOW TO PICK UP GIRLS IN 3 EASY STEPS

STEP 1: purposefully bump into girl(make sure you are typing into your calculator while doing this)

STEP 2: say “im sorry. i didnt see you, i was taking inventory of all my lizards”

STEP 3: make sure she sees the number 42069666 on the screen

coachcrewneck:

kingjaffejoffer:

Keith Olbermann gives an intro on how women are treated in sports. And then ethers the fuck out of the NFL for only suspending Ray Rice 2 games after knocking his wife out in an elevator.

I was talking about this the other day dude smoked weed and gets suspended the whole year and ray rice gets two games for beatin his wife

coffeeandcockatiels:

typette:

zeedikay:

drcabl3:

jessicreep:

kittydoom:

A Multi-Function Clip That Hides a Toolbox In Your Hair

Um yes!

I still want to bulk buy these and adonize  batch pink.

And it would still get stuck in my hair…

now THIS is what I’m fucking talking about
EDIT: IT FUNCTIONS AS A FUCKING ORANGE PEELER, AND EVEN A LAMP IF YOU HAVE A STRING AND SOME OIL. SERIOUSLY???

JUST IN CASE YOU APPARENTLY NEED AN EMERGENCY ONE FOR RELIGIOUS SERVICES?

Buying these asap.

coffeeandcockatiels:

typette:

zeedikay:

drcabl3:

jessicreep:

kittydoom:

A Multi-Function Clip That Hides a Toolbox In Your Hair

Um yes!

I still want to bulk buy these and adonize  batch pink.

And it would still get stuck in my hair…

now THIS is what I’m fucking talking about

EDIT: IT FUNCTIONS AS A FUCKING ORANGE PEELER, AND EVEN A LAMP IF YOU HAVE A STRING AND SOME OIL. SERIOUSLY???

JUST IN CASE YOU APPARENTLY NEED AN EMERGENCY ONE FOR RELIGIOUS SERVICES?

Buying these asap.

Reblogged from lumpenspaceproletariat

psych2go:

For more posts like these, go visit psych2go

Psych2go features various psychological findings and myths. In the future, psych2go attempts to include sources to posts for the for the purpose of generating discussions and commentaries. This will give readers a chance to critically examine psychology. 

Reblogged from pizza

  1. The boy who takes your virginity is only going to love you long enough for you to stay in his bed.
  2. Your first job is never the best job. But you’ll meet some of your best friends there.
  3. Sometimes things don’t go the way you expect them to at all.
  4. People are usually never who they say they are.
  5. If you love someone, you need to tell them. Nobody is good at the guessing game.
  6. If your best friends don’t like the boy you’re involving yourself with, chances are he’s bad news.
  7. If a boy starts an invitation with, “Are you home alone”/”I’ll be home alone”, say no. You are a human being, not a toy to be played with.
  8. If some boy invites you to “the backseat of his truck”, he’s a piece of shit. Tell him to fuck himself.
  9. “Sorry” doesn’t always fix what you messed up.
  10. Stop wasting time wishing you could take back what you already did.
  11. You are at fault sometimes.
  12. There’s going to be a boy that you let get away. Yes, you loved him. It’s for the best, though.
  13. Toxic people hardly ever start off toxic.
  14. It’s always nice to make new friends, but never forget who your real friends are.
  15. Never lose the friends that would answer their phone at 3am if you called
  16. Never lose sight of who you are because of a boy.
16 Things I Learned While Being 16  (via kryptoni-te)

smokeybissli:

merrymacaron:

caffeinatedcrafting:

Who says you need to order carry out for fried rice?

Ingredients:

  • 1/2 Cup brown whole grain rice
  • Onion, Diced
  • Carrots, Diced
  • 1 Egg
  • Olive Oil
  • Soy Sauce
  • Vinegar

Instructions:

  • Steam Rice for 45 min, add a little bit of vinegar with the water to make sticky
  • Dice veggies, throw  into pan with oil
  • Throw on rice and cake down
  • Cook for 4-5 min on medium-high heat
  • Flip/Mix Rice
  • Cook for another 4-5 min
  • Move the rice over for the scrambled egg, dice and mix as the egg cooks
  • Throw on soy sauce, let simmer for ~30-45 seconds
  • Eat :3

LET ME TELL YOU A THING IM THE BEST AT FRIED RICE! IM THE MOTHERFUCKING KING OF FRIED RICE!

lol that’s my go to poor students meal when we scramble for pennies 

Reblogged from peanut-butter-sexual